When I choose my blog title I thought it might be a funny play on words, I'm a Carer.....who cares, lol sounds cliche now, never mind, I'm writing this in part to tell you what I do and in part to complain, not the generally accepted state of mind for me to be in, but really fun to explore when I'm writing.

I've been a carer for 17 years and I just turned 30, I always meet people who are pleased and full of compliments when I tell them what I do ( I sometimes wonder if this springs from a fear, flatter the carer we may need her one day:) as much as it is gratifying it's very tiring, mainly for me because it's my mother who I care for, so the immediate follow up question is "what happened?" this story I pretty much say word for word every time, till I realize I am numb and bored by relating it, even to kind people.

I'll tell you what happened later on.

A major part of care work I would describe as slop jobs, these are the jobs that you need to build up a strong stomach to do, if the person your caring for is totally dependent, toileting is the number one hurdle to jump over, it doesn't matter how good you are at it now, the first time is horrible, I was 14 and it was a fiasco, this will be my first story.

My dad was at work, and my auntie who lived with us left to go out with her boyfriend, so I was taking care of mum, not too long into it she told me she needed to go to the toilet, so I tried to call dad, but he was over an hour away, then tried to call my auntie but her phone was off, so in the middle of feeling furious at being stuck to do this, and panic,I put together a plan, I ran into the bedroom and pulled the mattress off the bed, dragged it into the living room and placed it next to her recliner, then I stripped the pillows off the coach and scattered them on the floor.

Mum was smiling vaguely at this commotion, I reached down to lift her trying to hook her arms around my back, and for about ten seconds we managed to balance, then we fell, ( I was 20 kilos lighter and she was on her tip toes, if we hadn't fallen it would have been a miracle!) so I gathered some garbage bags and towels and rolled them under mum, figuring I could just soak up whatever she did, ha ha, I hadn't thought about her moving her bowels, they where flying out like pebbles and I was running around like a chook without a head, being faced not only with a mess, but the first time no one to help me out, so I called dad yelling at him and trying to clean her up the best I could, oh god, it took forever, over an hour later it was over, I was exhausted, but mum was clean and comfortable lying on the mattress propped up watching Bonanza, and I flopped on the couch fairly shook up, but aware that in a way, I had jumped the hurdle, even if we had fallen on the way.